Marji’s House has been operating since September, 1986, when I, Marji Hayner, took over the operation of Kathy’s Early Learning Center, the preschool and child care center in which I had been working for eight months. I then turned it into Good Beginnings, before finally changing the name to Marji’s House, since that’s what the kids always called it anyway.
My
philosophy of a quality preschool experience has remained the same throughout
the years. The most obvious reason being the children's continued happiness,
and ability to thrive and flourish, while engrossed in the structured yet situationally
accommodating creative space of Marji’s House.
I
take the child’s entire spectrum of wants and needs into account. Some are things they decide upon, which goes
along with being the totally unique individual they are, and other things I
decide, based on initial intense training and education, years and years (year
after year) of experience (24 years at Marji's House, and counting), and most importantly, an innate
sense of understanding and empathy for the child I come to know. I remember being a child, what it felt like,
what I thought about. I remember very
clearly, and that is the initial base place from which I draw the understanding
I’ve developed throughout the years.
Although
I spend my days with the children, I am actually serving the family as a
whole. It’s most important that you as a
parent are secure and enthusiastic about choosing Marji’s House. I’m here to listen to you, not just the
children, and I encourage you to talk.
Let me know how things are going for you. I need feedback from the parents in order to
continually grow and develop as a provider and a center. It’s the parents who have been a large part
in making Marji’s House such a success story.
Okay,
now a little about my own foundation.
I
grew up in a family of eight in the 1960’s.
My mother rose to the top of her field in occupational therapy, before
leaving her profession and getting married at 33. She met my dad in the hospital where he was
completing his residency in internal medicine and after two years of marriage
she began having babies. She had her
last child at the age of 41. Six kids in
six years. My dad ended up specializing
in public health. He was first with
We
investigated and explored together. We
climbed trees and built forts stashing them with stuff we found in the trash in
front of student’s houses. (It wasn’t
until much later that I realized what some of that weird stuff was- oh well, we
lived.) We played street games with the
entire neighborhood of children, who used to hang out at our house because it
was the funnest house on the block. We
played kick-the-can, pickle, hide-n’-go-seek, Frisbee, or if my brother wanted
a few teams for baseball, it was easy.
Just our family and few other kids would be enough to make it work. We played until dark, when my mother would
ring the big cowbell, which could be heard for miles around. Time to go home and get ready for bed.
In
the winter we would spend all day at the huge outdoor ice rink, skating all day
until dark. Or, just as likely, we would
be sledding or tobogganing at the arboretum until our feet were sufficiently
frozen enough to head home for a thaw by the fire. With hot chocolate, of course.
We
had our quiet times, too, such as reading or being read to at night, or playing
intensely competitive board games (which weren’t that quiet, come to think of
it) after homework, of course.
We
communicated with each other. We talked,
laughed, and argued.
We had no television, and that was planned.
We spent our time actually experiencing life, rather than watching
somebody else's ideas on the "boob tube" (as my Daddy called it!).
We didn’t miss it.
We
lived in a way that is hard to duplicate these days, but at Marji’s House, I’ve
been able to create a lot of the same spirit.
It’s based on loving praise and encouragement and tons of positive
attention in an environment with a clear enough structure so that the kids know
what is expected of them and what is going to happen next. Sometimes parents wonder why the children
listen to me, or why there seems to be such a contradiction between their
child’s behavior at home versus Marji’s House.
Well, without implying that a child’s interaction with a parent can be
fairly compared to interaction with another primary authority figure, there are
ways that we do things, ways we interact specifically and continuously, that
seems to be the paint that makes a pretty picture.
The
most important thing, as far as managing the kids in a way that works well for
us and also provides for an environment full of happy children with high self-
esteem, is POSITIVE ATTENTION. This
means we don’t wait for the child to do something wrong (something we don’t
want repeated) to give our enthusiastic and undivided attention. The children
receive attention while playing nicely, being helpful to their friends and
being a “good listener”. We notice these
things and speak to them enthusiastically about how much we appreciate what
they are doing or how they are interacting.
The children at Marji’s House do not have to create an unpleasant
situation to be noticed. (Note: I
instruct people who work here to avoid saying “ Good girl” or “Good boy”. I feel that if you call a child “good” you are
implying that with another behavior he could be called “bad”. You are qualifying the child rather than the
behavior. So instead you will hear us
say “Good job!” “Thank you for being such a good helper!” “Such good
manners!” “Good idea.” Etcetera. And when the term comes up with the children
my response is this: “No bad boys and no
bad girls. Sometimes when people are learning they do things we don’t
like. But all children are good.”)
Positive
attention is very important at Marji’s House.
How we speak to your child is of paramount importance. (A visiting
licensor once commented that our children are more verbal than children in
other centers.)
We’ve
made it a habit only because it works so well.
I
believe that children should be treated as complete human beings who just
happen to be in a different developmental stage than most adults. As adults who matter in their life we have a
chance to surround them with encouraging words and acknowledgment. I believe it is our job to help build your
child. A child with strong self-esteem
and a feeling of accomplishment every day is a child who has a great foundation
for anything else she may want to do in life.
I guess you could say that we will help to create in your child a strong
foundation that he will be able to fall back on for the rest of his life.